I was just thinking about this yesterday as we were making a meal for a friend who's hubby was in an accident, and our homeschool group was providing dinners for the family while he is in the hospital for an undetermined amount of time.
I love the feeling of making food and being able to nourish in that way. It makes me happy to put together a lasagne, make bread, etc. And the kids really enjoyed making brownies and muffins, knowing it was for friends of theirs. I enjoy helping in a way that I can, and making food is so easy and fun to do.
Now, why as a society, does it seem like asking for help is a sign of weakness, and accepting help is almost as hard, having to insist people take it sometimes? It seems this day and age, people are so isolated emotionally from anyone that isn't immediate family. It's hard to find neighbors that are 'neighborly' or that even know the names of the people on their own street. Remember the days of borrowing a cup of sugqar or an egg? I don't know many people that do that anymore, it seems the most contact we have with neighbors is a wave as we're driving by or a hello at the mailbox. Everyone is so busy.
Which brings me back to the helping and acceptance of help. I know from being on the recieving end, it is an amazing feeling of gratitude that someone cared enough not to only think of you, but to act on those feeling, figuring out what would be a way to help, emotionally, financially, or physically, and pitch in to make someone's life better. It's extremely humbling, and can be very hard to accept. I'm not sure why, but I'm getting better at being able to say "Yes, we would very much appreciate and accept what you are so graciously offering." Instead of "No, no, thank you, though."
I realized while kneading bread, and picking out eggshells of the dough as the little ones helped me in the kitchen, that 'letting' people help can be as much for them as it is for person on the recieving end. It gives me a feeling of puposefulness (is that even a word?) and lets me show how much I care and serves so many purposes for everyone involved, as well as bring people closer to their community.
From here on out, I will do my best to say YES to helping, as well as receiving help, and be overjoyed to be able to do it.
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2 comments:
I have had the same though many a time. Thank you for writing this.
Okay so I am reading this late, but man you hit the nail on the head. I hate asking for help. I think it's that part of me that I see people judging us for needing help, like "Well maybe they shouldn't have so many kids then..." I have to let go of that, I really do. Because God knows, especially right after a new baby comes, we really do need help and end up feeling so worn down trying to do it by ourselves, Jamie and I....
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